In my role as a Sales Director I do not just ask the sales team to just go and sell product.

What I ask is “Who can you help and with what?”

So what is the difference as in both cases products are bought or not. Actually the difference is significant as in the first case the sales person would simply be considering their sales and revenue. In the latter however the sales person puts the needs of others first.

When going to help other people you consider first what can you give without consideration for what you may be rewarded. This change of attitude for a sales person changes the dynamic of how they do their job from it is all about “Me” and my needs to “Us” and how by helping we all can prosper.

When applied to life in general it creates a more positive approach to life where we look for opportunities to help other people and in doing so build more prosperous relationships. Think how great relationships would be if we actively helped each other rather than worried about our agenda?

So a simple change of attitude from “Me” to “Us” can have a really positive effect not only for yourself but for those you encounter.

So in the following week, who can you help?

Positive, Partnerships, Produce, Powerful, Prosperity

Relaxed Confidence: For Life and Living.

Relax and let the ideas flow

I spent last Friday afternoon with the team from Porchlight in Canterbury who do great work with the homeless and disadvantaged in Kent.

We worked on developing personal values and how they become our purpose in life.

“Your vales become your destiny” Gandhi.

Great sports people and masters of their skill naturally relax and allow their skills to flow creating success. This however is quite different to many people who when trying something new try so hard and concentrate they end up becoming blocked. It is only when they relax that the skill starts to flow and the learning process progresses.

So before we started our session on values we completed a relaxation exercise to allow our minds to relax so that ideas would flow away from day to day thoughts. As we shared experiences and ideas each of us were able to develop our own awareness of our values.

I appreciate at times it is good to get away and be alone to think but working within a group of people willing to share works so that all can benefit. By sharing our experiences we help each other learn by building a wider perspective. It is in this wider perspective and understanding that we learn more about ourselves and in the case of the values session how we can add positively to the world.

So what did I really learn from the session?

  • When we relax things start to flow
  • Be willing to share experience so all can benefit
  • It is with wide experience that solutions are found
  • You are never alone there are always people who have experienced as you, good and bad
  • It is not only in organised groups that the process works. It will work with friends, acquaintances, family and colleagues alike, it just takes the willingness to be open and non judgmental


Relaxed Confidence: For Life and Living.

Control Freak or Control Adapter?

The abnormal weather in the UK continually reminds me that we cannot control everything in life. There are those in life who do try to control everything but simply end up frustrated, anxious and stressed.

Rather than trying to control everything is it not better to only control and act where you can make a difference positively?

Here are some top tips to allow you to become a control adapter and not stuck in the emotional trap of the control freak:

  1. Change your attitude from looking at the negatives to the positives in situations. This is the most immediate thing you can do to adapt. Try thinking of five things you appreciate now? This simple act we get you focused on the now and what is good. 
  1. Let go of what you cannot control. Holding will only hold you back as other move forward. 
  1. Relax into the circumstances so you can flow rather than push. In this way you will make progress with least resistance. Remember water flows around obstacles yet has the power to shape mountains. 
  1. Expect the best outcome but prepare for the worst. 
  1. By broadening your perspective by looking at life from many angles consider where you can act positively. You cannot see the top of the mountain if you stand too close yet can see all when you step back. 
  1. Change is inevitable and the circumstances you find yourself in will move forward and by adopting the tips above you can prosper. 

Relaxed Confidence: For Life, and Living